Singer-songwriter, activist and mum-of-four Rebecca Ferguson MBE, 39, talks to Jo Ebsworth about rejecting fame to find true happiness, the mental health benefits of walking in nature, and why owning ducks helps her to stay grounded.
Words: Joanna Ebsworth. Images: Jon Serbey.
My definition of good health is “everything in moderation”. Ultimately, I think a truly happy person enjoys a good balance of everything, and they recognise that life is there to be enjoyed and experienced. That’s why I don’t believe in overly dieting, because I feel like people are never satisfied, and they end up yo-yoing when they finish the diet.
I was 23-years-old when I auditioned for the seventh series of The X Factor back in 2010, and I found it really hard when I first started going to celebrity events because it was very much about what size you were. If you wanted to loan designer clothing, you had to be this “sample size” to fit into anything, so size zero was scarily in and everyone had quite child-like bodies. I remember just thinking, ‘Oh no, this is not for me. This is weird. I’m not into this.’
Being on The X Factor was a bit of a whirlwind. It was such a huge programme back then, and there’s no denying it was very entertaining to watch. But most of us were working-class kids who were suddenly catapulted to the height of fame [fellow contestants on Rebecca’s series included One Direction, Cher Lloyd, Matt Cardle and Aiden Grimshaw], and we couldn’t walk down the street after a show or we’d be mobbed – that’s how powerful it was.
At the time, I think that really intense fame felt exciting and different. But then you get a bit older and things plateau a bit, and you think, ‘OK, this lifestyle isn’t that grounding’. I mean, of course it’s not going to be grounding! But that’s when you know it’s time to get back to reality.
It was around 2017 when I realised I needed to keep things more real. I was having a conversation with my brother and there was a moment where he said, ‘Come on, Rebecca, really? Do you think we’ve all just got the money to go and do that?’ After that, I had this realisation that I was properly disconnected from reality, and I wasn’t living in the present. I’d lost touch with how life was or how life should be, and I thought, ‘Oh my gosh, I’ve been in this machine too long.’
Around the same time, I also had a moment where I realised I’d never felt truly happy. I was at the peak of my career, but I found that everything being said about me was tied up in my success, like where my album was going to chart, which DJs wanted to partner with me and what artists wanted me to tour with them.
I realised that my whole worth was being measured by external things, and I didn’t know who I was when I wasn’t being a singer. That’s when I decided I would try to find proper happiness and contentment.
For many celebrities today, I think there’s a constant pressure to chase fame. It’s all about the number of likes and endorsements you can get, and while I understand that’s the nature of the job, I just got to a point where I had to turn my back on the fame game, in the sense that I stopped actively courting it.
Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love singing and songwriting and performing, but that’s it. That’s the line. Work for me now is all about singing well and having fun on stage, then recognising I don’t need to stay in that space: I don’t need the audience to approve of me for me to still feel good.
Someone recently said to me, ‘Beccy, you could do so much more’. But I’m happy being in mum mode and following my own little path. I think a lot of people think I’m odd because I’m not sticking to the script – I haven’t done the West End or any of those reality shows like I’m A Celebrity… or Strictly Come Dancing – but I’m OK with that because I think doing them would cause me cognitive dissonance.
For me, self-love is about following my inner truth, trusting my inner voice and not having to seek out validation from anyone – especially if it involves doing something that doesn’t feel completely, authentically me. Maybe in a couple of years I’ll come out of the mum bubble, give myself a bit of a makeover and get back in the game. But I’m just not there right now.
I’ll be 40 in July, and I think I’ve been quite lucky with my health so far, touch wood. I had the odd health scare when I was younger, but that was definitely associated with overworking in my early 20s. A lot of the stress I experienced back then was related to how I was treated by the music industry, and I think when you’re not treated very well, it will have an adverse effect on your body.
My experience of the music industry was that it was very exploitative, so I’ve been campaigning to make changes because I don’t want other young people to have the same experience as me. I’ve managed to change how the welfare of artists is thought about a bit, but not completely, because the foundations of the industry are so focused on making money.
It’s like there’s this deluded idea that you have to pay a really terrible price if you want to succeed as an artist, but I wanted to break that taboo and say, ‘Yes, we are entertainers and, yes, we are here to bring joy, but we are not here to be abused.’
A lot of my journey to happiness has been about finding stability and grounding myself. I found somewhere really nice to live that’s surrounded by lots of countryside; staying in one place for a long time has allowed me to put down roots and become more settled in myself as a woman. I find trying to live as normal a life as possible in between performances helps to keep me stable, so I’ll sing and then retreat.
I always wanted ducks, but I think I had this false fairytale illusion in my head about what kind of life I’d need to live to have some. Then, recently, I realised that I should just get the ducks! They’re the loveliest pets, even though they’re really messy. I’ve also got two chickens. The rooster was a bit of a nightmare because he was waking the neighbours and I had to soundproof the coop, but throwing on my wellies every day to sort out the ducks definitely keeps me grounded.
I’m not saying that’s a better way of living – it’s just what I decided was the better way for me.
I’m really bad at high-impact exercise. My body just doesn’t like it, and my spine most certainly doesn’t! I love swimming, and before I had my son Albie in February 2023, I used to always go swimming and to the steam room and sauna. Since then, I’ve not really had time to go back into the gym or pool, probably because I don’t have childcare, so most of my exercise consists of walking in nature.
I think that’s quite usual when you have a toddler, but I don’t mind. I’m at my happiest when I’m in nature and listening to birdsong. It’s so calming, I find my brain just switches off.
I’ve always eaten relatively well. Growing up, my mum was always studying nature and food as medicine, so I had the kind of upbringing where she always had a food remedy for every illness. When I’m starting to feel a bit iffy, I’m quite good at going, ‘OK, I need this food now’, or I’ll make a big pot of chicken soup with loads of veg.
Generally speaking, I always cook from scratch, but then going back to everything in moderation, I’m not scared to get a takeaway at the weekend. For the most part, our diet at home is quite Mediterranean and tapas-based, so lunchtime is usually olives, houmous and things like that, which I think is really healthy.
I try to get all my vitamins and minerals from food, but when we struggled with Albie’s sleep and I was absolutely shattered, I bought some Novomins Magnesium Gummies (£19.99, novomins.com). They weren’t cheap, but they were unbelievably good at helping to restore my energy levels.
I like to meditate when I want to unwind, and I also love to paint. I’ve been doing a lot of mixed media stuff where I’ll create the art, add lots of jewels and flowers and mad stuff onto it, put it through an AI digital thing, get it printed and add even more stuff afterwards. It’s quite a complex process and I’ve not got it quite together yet, but for now I’m just having fun with it.
I also love studying history and science, and I wrote a paper on some of the things that are going on with AI at the moment. Maybe it’s an ADHD thing, but I can really hyperfocus and go down rabbit holes when something interests me.
I didn’t know I had ADHD growing up. I’ve never been good at organising things and I had a bit of a reputation amongst my friends for being a bit dozy. ‘Oh, it’s alright… it’s just Beccy, she’s a bit dopey,’ they’d say. But that’s because I’m a real deep thinker and my ADHD is very much in my mind.
My brain never switches off; it’s constantly creating, and when I’m not making music, I’m always trying to invent something or find a solution to a problem. Once I’d done the tests and got the results, I went through a bit of a process of fighting it.
I bought all the Mrs Hinch books (I love Mrs Hinch), and I tried to get super organised, but I eventually got to a place where I was like, ‘You know what? I’m never going to be that person with drawers of perfectly folded knickers, and I’m always going to be that person who meets the deadline in the final hour, but that’s OK’. I’m a perfectly imperfect human and that’s fine by me.
I’m definitely into wellness and I’m open to trying alternative therapies. I don’t know whether sound baths work because I’ve never experienced one, but I listen to certain vibrations of music on YouTube and I do think there’s something in it. I love using aromatherapy oils, especially rose, and when things aren’t crazy with the baby, I do a lot of lymphatic drainage massage on my face; I moisturise my skin about three times a day!
I think it’s great that so many people seem more interested in looking after their wellbeing these days, and I’m really looking forward to performing at The Big Retreat Festival towards the end of May. I’ll be doing a little talk during the day about some of the practices I’ve used to find my inner peace and then I’ll be singing on stage at night – I’m all about bringing the good vibes!
Follow Rebecca on Instagram at @rebeccaferguson__
