While stress might gear up the engines for some, it can be pretty costly for others. To get a better understanding, I spoke to Dr Kenneth Ro – a double board-certified physician in Internal and Emergency Medicine – about why we need to learn how to regulate it, not avoid it…
Words: Amy Dowrick | Images: Shutterstock
Stress is a term that we are all too familiar with – but there’s a lot more to it than screaming into your pillow. A lot of the symptoms often go completely unnoticed, adding a pile-on of pressure to our day-to-day – but many don’t realise that we are capable of getting in control of it.
“The body does not always scream. Sometimes it whispers. That is what gets missed,” says Dr Ro. “The obvious symptoms are anxiety, irritability, poor sleep, and fatigue. But what I see more often, especially in high-performing individuals, are the overlooked signs.”
“Loss of motivation. Brain fog. Subtle weight gain despite doing all the right things. Decreased resilience to minor setbacks. Even reduced exercise capacity or slower recovery after workouts,” he adds. “These are not random. They are signals that the system is stuck in a prolonged stress response.”
Finding the cause of your stress
Dr Ro says that our environment, like work, family and life at home, often play a minor part in driving stress, and suggests that the focus should actually be on how we process those external factors.
“Most people think stress is about what is happening around them. Deadlines, responsibilities, world events,” he says. “But in my experience, it is more about how the body is processing those demands internally.”
“The real drivers of chronic stress are things like poor sleep, constant low-grade inflammation, blood sugar instability, and a lack of true recovery. Add to that the constant cognitive load, notifications, decisions, responsibility, and you create a system that never exits survival mode. Stress is not just psychological. It is physiological overload.”
Dr Kenneth Ro’s tips to alleviate stress
Dr Ro believes that navigating stress can be helped by simple mindset shifts, from resetting how we unwind to being consistent with self-care.
Change your perspective
“As an ER physician for decades, I have worked in environments where stress is constant (and often life or death),” he says. “Early in my career, I approached stress by pushing through it. Over time, I saw the cost of that approach, not just in my patients, but in myself.”
“What changed my perspective is realising that stress management is not about eliminating stress. It is about building the capacity to recover from it,” he adds. “Sleep, breathing, movement, metabolic health. These are not lifestyle extras. They are the levers that determine whether stress breaks you down or builds you up.”
Find the right relief
“We are not overstressed. We are under recovered,” says Dr Ro. “And ironically, many of the things we turn to for relief, like doom scrolling, late night screen time, or constant digital stimulation, keep the nervous system activated instead of allowing it to reset. What feels like unwinding is often just a different form of stress input.”
Instead, Dr Ro suggests we move away from trying to handle stress better and move toward giving our body better conditions to function.
“Start with sleep,” he says. “It is the foundation. Then look at how you are fuelling your body, how often you are actually in a recovery state, and whether your nervous system is ever getting the signal that it is safe to stand down.”
Stay consistent
Dr Ro believes that consistency goes beyond having a solid routine – it’s about how you implement these practices, which he encourages you make part of your identity.
“Most people try to add stress management on top of an already overloaded life, and it does not stick. It has to become essential,” he says.
“One of the most practical ways to do that is to protect the first hour of your day and the last hour before sleep. If you start your day with intention instead of distraction, you set the tone for everything that follows. You are in control rather than reacting to the world.”
“The last hour of your day is where recovery begins. If you fill it with stimulation, screens, scrolling, unfinished tasks, you carry that activation straight into your sleep. But if you create even a simple buffer, you give your body the signal that it is safe to shift into recovery,” he adds.
“The people who sustain this understand that taking care of themselves is not selfish. It is what allows them to show up for everything else. When your system works, everything else works better.”
Dr. Ken Ro is a double board-certified physician with decades of experience in emergency medicine. He is the founder of Back in the Game Men™, a physician-led precision health practice for high-performing men in midlife, and is also the creator of the RECLAIM™ Method, a systems-based approach to restoring energy, resilience, and performance by addressing the root physiology behind modern health decline. His work focuses on helping men move from burnout and survival mode back to clarity, strength, and purpose. Find out more at: kennethromd.com
